How much time have you spent connecting with your partner today? More than your devices? Undoubtedly, social media is a double-edged weapon. On the one hand, social media enables us to connect with family and friends, develop our interpersonal and professional networks, share knowledge, and find new goods, companies, and ideas that we might not have otherwise encountered. In contrast, social media has been associated with negative emotions such as loneliness, selfishness, and low self-esteem.
Let’s focus on how to be married to the one you married, not your cell phone.
For romantic relationships, social networking can be particularly damaging. Couples that make poor use of social media frequently experience jealousy and inappropriate expectations.
We only see what other people, individuals, or couples, have with each other vs. ourselves. It is tempting to play the comparison game, which is a recipe for bitterness, depression, or anxiety.
Additionally, irresponsible social media usage can cause a gulf between love partners and damage the vital sense of connection and trust. More than half of Americans surveyed by the Pew Research Center in 2019 stated that their spouses were always or occasionally distracted by their phones during talks.
We are all familiar with this scene: one or both spouses have their noses buried in their cell phones. Ask yourself whether this is sustainable for a long-term, satisfying relationship. Couples can participate in couples therapy to overcome these problems. If you and your partner want to prevent your social media habits from harming your relationship, consider the following ways to engage and focus on the relationship, or the “WE”, with your spouse or partner.
Spend quality time
Try to spend time with your partner offline. What damages relationships is “falling into a routine” and spending less and less quality time together. If you feel your relationship is being harmed by excessive social media usage, this should be a sign for you to step back from it and reconnect with each other in the real world.
Focus on more interaction
Couples can find ways to interact daily. Everyone has a unique way of connecting with others, aside from the digital world. Maybe choose something that is meaningful to the other person. You could make and bring your partner some coffee. You could share your feelings about something important for the benefit of the WE. Pray, meditate, or do some other type of soulmate activity together.
The power of reconnecting
You should also consider finding ways to reconnect with each other in the real world–based on favorite past times. You could try retaking a past evening trip together, cooking a favorite meal together, or playing board games you enjoy. This can be a great way to get your mind off social media and have an easy way to reconnect.
Differences in expectations and priorities could be the root of many relationship issues. You must know your partner’s expectations and needs, be aware of why it is important to both people, and how both will act accordingly–for the benefit of the WE.
Lead with love
Follow your heart to lead with love. It is important to listen to each other’s needs, learn from one another, show understanding, support each other unconditionally, and face challenges together. These are the basis for a loving relationship–the WE.
Create digital tech boundaries
Can you and your partner agree on times or locations devoid of technology? Consider your home-specific activities or periods (such as watching a movie together or helping your children with their schoolwork) and other instances in which it might be advantageous to put your cell phones or computers away.
You may also decide to impose restrictions on the content of your digital use, such as sexual-related content or contact with past partners. Respect the boundaries you and your partner establish and agree to remind each other in a courteous yet prompt manner if one of you begins to stray.
When to bring in help from an expert
If your partner feels overwhelmed by excessive social-media usage, it may help if you find a professional therapist. A relationship professional may advise you on how to avoid escalating the conflict. Therapy can give many techniques to share and dilute problems while discussing how to repair broken relationships–for the benefit of the WE.
Emphasize love and support
Your partner may need extra support. This is especially true if they feel overwhelmed by lack of sleep, poor health, or financial stress. You can help by encouraging your partner to take a break from social media, focus on being more productive and positive, and getting a professional therapist.
The Bottom Line!
In our world, it is essential to keep up with the digital world. However, this need not be at the expense of your relationships — it is possible to have a healthy and satisfying relationship despite social media use.
Spending time with each other and creating many occasions for meaningful conversations is extremely important. Finding ways to reconnect, have fun, and show appreciation to your partner is crucial. After all, it is with your partner that you can experience love and fulfillment, not your device.
Social media can be an excellent resource for keeping in touch with friends and family who may live far away from you. But do not let social media define the meaningful relationships right in front of you. Remember, you have choices: You can invest in and nurture your relationship or leave it vulnerable to all the dangerous tendencies of social media, which are of low consciousness. Keep in mind, the purpose of your life and your partner’s life is to be “conscious for the benefit of the WE”.